Far, far away from here.

Tell me I’m sensitive. I bruise so easy.

                True story, I really do. If you check up on my Facebook you already know that I fell off a bar stool. I have a sore boobie and bruised shin. It’s a fantastic story. I was getting up to “fight” with someone, my leg was hooked under the bottom rung of the stool. We all rolled over, and I fell down, to the ground, to get out of the rain, boom boom boom boom. I laid there for a while. The fall itself wasn’t so bad; the recovery however, has not been pleasant.

                I like having thin skin; it shows off the effects of others on my being. If you upset me, you will probably know it. If you inspire me, I will tell you about it. If you hurt me, I will bruise.

                 No one’s favorite pass time should be beer. Its in my top 10.

                 I don’t think people ever want to be happy. I read somewhere that vacations don’t make people happy, it’s the weeks before. We like having something to look forward to, we like having hope that there is something out there that will be better than what we have right now. Its not the destination, it’s the drive. I’m happy right now, but its that bitter, twisted, fucked happiness. My hope is skewed, as well as my reality. But it makes me happy, who am I to judge myself?

                I’ve never been on a plane at night time. Why are there so many flights late at night? Gets my hopes all up for the shooting stars, but you give me something to wish for.

                Even when we fight we can be happy, it’s the hope that it will be so much better when we make up, those “little happy moments” that’s what drives us to deal with so much shit.

                I don’t know what I want, I don’t ever know what I’m doing, but I know why I’m doing it. I know what I don’t want. I don’t want to be bored. I don’t want to feel like I am a part of the whole. I don’t want to feel neglected or unimportant. I don’t want to be the big spoon (very often). I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to be tied down. I don’t want to be a mouth only to kiss. I don’t want to be someone’s Thursday night girl. I don’t want to be a secret. I don’t want to be a lie.

                We are all just looking for the little glimmer of hope, we are just waiting on the vacation. I’m happy not getting away; I just like daydreaming about it.